People talk about how a relationship takes work. A relationship takes time. A relationship has to grow and blossom into a partnership between two people. But what’s funny is that nobody ever discusses the essential requirements for this “job.” People are told by relationship therapists that they need to burn their lists and eliminate any preconceived ideas of what a perfect mate should be. Well, that’s complete rubbish! Here is a list of 7 tips to turn your failed dating life into a flourishing business.
If you want to lump the words “relationship” and “work” into a tired phrase, then why can’t individuals have a list of qualifications. Like any demanding job, once you know what is needed to perform the task, why should you not advise any potential new hire of their responsibilities? There shouldn’t be a training period for applicants who aren’t even able to perform simple job duties. And, if an employer doesn’t like the choices presented at the time of application, they do not have a problem denying an applicant the job.
In many heterosexual relationships, women think that it is their job, as a relationship employer, to train rookies to perform tasks they don’t have all the equipment to handle. Let’s talk brass tacks for a second. I have been in quite a few hand-holding relationships. The type of time-wasting, love-sick situations where you know, in your heart, that this person is a good person, but you also know that they will always just coast and have no room for advancement in the company of You. We’ve all had one of those relationships. Hell, maybe we’ve had 4 of them. You may be in one of them right now. Know this: they will never be more than they are if what they were was unqualified to begin with.
But to know whether or not you’re wasting everyone's time, you must first understand what you want!
We can’t blame the bad relationships that went nowhere on the applicant. You should be the one feeling guilty. Guilt for leading them on because, let’s face it, you’re the job they wanted. Feel guilty for not recognizing the signs earlier in the relationship to prevent potential disappointment upon termination.
And most importantly, guilt for, yet again, wasting your time while the possible Right One found another job with a more demanding boss. Who knows, that candidate may end up so broken that by the time they find their way back to you, they will be a shell of the person they once were. Now, YOU should feel guilty for throwing off the entire balance of the universe.
1. The Business Plan
Enough silliness; how should you start looking at yourself and your love like a business? Every business has a plan. A structure. A foundation. It offers something that is competitive with what is on the market. What is yours? How are you more valuable than your competition? Let’s face it: if you are a woman on the market for a heterosexual relationship, every other woman nearing her 30s without a husband will be your strongest competition. These women have been building the most robust portfolio, and they have more tricks of the trade than any Fortune 500 Company could ever wish to have. David Copperfield has fewer tricks up his sleeve than these ladies. What can you offer? Once established, you can better put together your employment application.
2. Job Qualifications
3. Hours of Operation
4. Budget Allowances
5. The Interview
6. Background Checks
7. Check Those References
It’s important to know what you are worth. Anything we refer to as work should be treated the same way employment is treated. It’s not just about finding someone who will work for you; it’s about finding someone who works well with you. I believe one of the biggest mistakes people make these days is trying to squeeze something convenient into their lives. I’m beyond guilty of this practice. But as I got older and found the one, I realized that relationships are more than that. It is work. It is long hours. It is commitment. It’s about dedication. The amount of faith we put into a profession we love should be given to a human we love. As animals, we are naturally drawn to the next stimulating thing that comes our way. It’s about understanding that though something more stimulating has reared its head into your peripheral vision, your job security and love trump all other temptations. It’s about knowing that you own a piece of something successful and want to see it make it to the top. Don’t treat your love life any different than you would treat your career. It has taken years for many of us to make it on our skills, so never rest on your laurels. There is no glass ceiling in love.
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